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We love our son, but we don't want this kind of influence in our home (we have younger kids in the house). Or should we just accept his choice of lifestyle and proceed as if nothing has happened or changed? But before suggesting some ways to do that, we want you to know that our hearts go out to you and our prayers are with you in the midst of your pain and confusion.How should you respond to this information your son has told you?As the dialogue begins, set your sights on two overarching goals: number one, to that the two of you are on the same page.As the conversation moves forward, make a conscious effort to use first-person words – "I" and "we" – instead of "you-based" language, which can easily be heard as controlling, directive, blaming, shaming, scolding, or self-righteous.

Make a conscious choice to approach the matter in a "discovery mode." Urge your son to do the same.

As a parent, you may feel shaken or compelled to question or re-examine your own beliefs on the subject of homosexuality in the light of this experience. A review of your own understandings and convictions is normal, and even wise, as you think about how you are called by the Lord to proceed.

Honest questioning can actually serve to confirm and solidify your convictions as well as correct possible attitudes, language or assumptions that may be missing the mark of Christian love – or that are simply not yet informed on this complex and hotly debated topic.

Say something like, "We're glad you've shared this with us.

We would rather know what you're going through than not know what you're going through, so we're pleased that you've chosen to talk with us about this issue.

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